To a Stopwatch
To the noisemaker … stopwatch apparently buried somewhere inside my couch in one of too many possible unreachable places. We know it is 5:50 pm. Again. Really.
Merry Christmas, Now Play Nice! (Or, Let’s Boycott the Boycotts)
No, I’m not speaking to my kids, actually. I’m speaking to both sides of the “culture wars” being fought in the U.S. right now. You know who you are. The Religious Right is boycotting places like Home Depot for being Read More
Don’t You Hate It When …
You know how after you put some anti-frizzies gel on your hair, you set down the bottle and leave the little pop-up lid open by accident, and then by further accident someone comes along and knocks it over and no Read More
To the Potential Wardrobe Malfunction in the Restaurant
To the lady … er, woman sitting directly in my unobstructed line of vision at the restaurant this evening: I really didn’t want to spend the entirety of my family dinner wondering if your next deep breath was going to Read More
Woodpeckers
Specifically, woodpeckers that decide to nest at the top of a metal chimney. Woodpeckers who, whilst nesting at the top of said metal chimney, enjoy employing their beaks on said metal chimney at 5:00 a.m. (You may enjoy knowing that Read More
Kids and Cleaning
How is it that, presented with a three-foot-square pile of their junk to put away, every single time they will locate the one object they don’t know where to put, and walk around mournfully with it in their hands, as Read More
Auto Flush Toilets
You know. The ones that flush too soon and turn your toilet time into a bidet surprise.
Repeating the Wrong Letter
As cell phone texts, Facebook posts, and chat rooms continue to increase in number, so do the little typographical mannerisms frequently used to convey emotion and feeling. We’re all familiar with acronyms such as LOL (laugh out loud) and BRB Read More
Columbus Day, or What Does “Discover” Really Mean?
So, Columbus Day was a few weeks ago, and all the brouhaha was about whether we should celebrate the invasion of the New World by the Old, or whether we can even say Columbus really discovered anything! After all, the Read More